|Continue to next
You'll see no faces and no names of gay East
Africans on this website. It isn't safe!
|Gay and Christian in
|This website was constructed in July of 2007
Visits made to this web page since August 2007
|Meet us under
the acacia tree.
|"I have other sheep that
are not of this fold. I
must bring them in
|Photo at right:
Gays telling their stories
to one antoher in the
Nairobi gated apartment
complex where Steve
and Jose were staying.
|Jose Ortiz, Other
|Steve Parelli, Other
Sheep Executive Director
Jose is leading one of the
many discussion groups
that met in our apartment.
Steve is teaching the
power point presentation
on the Bible and
Homosexuality from his
|Everyone told me I was gay
so I thought I would try it
Rwandeese Man, Mid-Twenties
Submitted August 19, 2007
We might keep in touch afterwards if they are okay with our
differences regarding homosexuality. I do not believe in gay marriage
no names of
2006, a local
published a list of
and lesbians. The
gay rigths group
on the list lost
jobs and were
VISIT Steve and Jose!
Visit the Other Sheep web site of the Executive
Director, Steve Parelli (at right in photo), and his
partner Jose Ortiz.
I started questioning myself seriously about gay life two years
ago . . .
I am from Rwanda, Africa. I am in my mid-twenties. A life story is
not something one tells on one page but at least I will try and tell
you something. I started questioning myself seriously about gay
life two years ago when I met a guy who is really intelligent which
impresses me. He wanted to protect himself so much; whenever
I would do anything with him sexually he would be very
aggressive afterwards. That might be because I do not want him
to do all he would want me to do with him. For me he's in
denial. He needs help. One side was pushing him and then
another side was pushing him.
Everyone told me I was gay so I thought I would try it . . .
Since my tender age, people used to tell me I was gay. But I
was not concerned and did not understand. That's not me;
What are you talking about? The biggest problem I had in my
life is that I'm effeminate and it makes a big difference, and
people make assumptions; people would run away and I would
not understand, so I realized people thought I was gay. So I
thought I would try the experience and see if I was gay. Given
that I was rejected by the straight world. But when I tried I felt
empty. I realized there are things I cannot do with a man
however much I forced myself to try. I do not see any future
between me and another man in marriage for instance.
I like to caress with a real friend of the same sex . . .
I can caress with a real friend of the same sex, if they really want
me to, as I would do something for a friend just to make them
happy. This is done in the way I can be asked from a friend to
cook for them, help them with their work, but there is nothing like
a special gratification I get from caressing. Penetration either
way is out of question. But if my friend did not appreciate that I
would feel humiliated.
I don't believe in gay marriage . . .
As a Catholic person I don't believe in gay marriage because
there was not Adam and Steve, there was Adam and Eve in the
times of creation. That is for a purpose. I strongly believe in
complementarity which is like men have what women do not
have and vice versa. And that a man and a woman should join
together in marriage. If they have gay marriage they should call
it civil union or something like that. They should not call it gay
marriage because the word marriage should refer to the union
of a man and a woman in order to perpetuate human kind.
. . . Jose Ortiz of Other Sheep found me on the Internet on Hi5
and wrote me . . . The Spanish language was our real connection
I became connected with Other Sheep through Jose Ortiz who
found me on the Internet on Hi5 and wrote me. He was
interested in me because I speak Spanish here in Africa. Jose
wanted to write me about my Spanish. Jose gave me the
website of Other Sheep and when I read it I discovered he was a
married gay person. I wrote him and asked him if he really
believes that one can be gay and Christian. I sent him verses
from Awake about homosexuality. The verses were from
Leviticus and from Romans, I guess. We didn't talk about these
verses through email, but we did go on corresponding in
general, writing in Spanish. Spanish was our real connection.
I got to meet Jose and Other Sheep by traveling to Kampala,
Uganda, where he was with his partner . . .
When Jose was in Kenya, he invited me to come from Rwanda
to Kampala, Uganda, to meet him there and offered to finance
my trip, as I had told him about my financial situation. For the
first time in my life I believed a total stranger. I do not know why,
but I did believe him and took the first long trip of my whole life,
alone in a country I have never been to meet total strangers
from the other side of the world. Because he was already
coupled with a partner, I felt secure and wanted to come and
meet them both. That's how I met them and learned about the
Other Sheep more.
I will keep in touch with Jose and Steve if they are okay with our
differences regarding homosexuality . . .
Jose and Steve are partners for ten years now and are both
theologians. We might keep in touch afterwards if they are okay
with our differences regarding homosexuality. I do not believe in
gay marriage for example and doubt about the fact that it is just
not an obsession or some kind of curable psychological
disorder grounded in one's background like lack of male
companionship in the younger age for men. That being said I
am not homophobic, tolerance is the golden rule if humankind is
to survive and overcome issues like racism, gender based
discrimination as well as any other discrimination.